Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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