Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
