Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
