i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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