it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize