I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
