I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
