addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
