whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Randomize
