You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Randomize