Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
