The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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