We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Randomize
