Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
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Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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