I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
