No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize