I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
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