we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
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