I must be too annoying 4 u.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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