your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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