I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
