I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
false alarm, still single
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