theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
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he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
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It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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