I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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