Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
