Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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