It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
