Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize