you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
