She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
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Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
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