you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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