I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
