Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
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