Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
you traded sex for a burrito?
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize