Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
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I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
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I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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