i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
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having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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