That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
