brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
