omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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