IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
My pussy is not your playground.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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