I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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