It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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