even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
