We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
birth control should be required to get into college
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
