Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize