Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Randomize