dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
