i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
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