capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
