no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize