I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize