Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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